Monday, November 14, 2011

The Duggars 20th…and undeserved judgment.

I do NOT understand all the criticism toward Michelle Duggar for being pregnant with her 20th child.  Yes, I understand that they have enough children to make up two baseball teams, but honestly, is it anyone else’s business??

The size of a family is for a couple to decide and should not be criticized by others.  In no way does their decision to have a big family negatively affect our society (it’s not like they’re mooching off the government- they are raising responsible, productive citizens).  In fact, I commend them for sticking true to their values, being able to provide for their large family, and raising responsible, healthy, and Godly children. 

I also have to admit that I don’t even watch the show (and never have), but for some reason it struck a nerve with me to read all the FB statuses, tweets, and other media outlets slamming the family for their decision. Wait, let’s read that again…"THEIR DECISION.” 

It REALLY bothers me when people are judgmental of others; especially when they claim to be Christians.  I know Christians are not perfect, and I lead the pack of imperfections.  I certainly have a lot of faults, but I can honestly say this is something I don’t feel like I struggle with.  What someone chooses to do with their life and their family is NOT for me to scrutinize or condemn (unless it goes against God’s word- like child abuse).

Imagine how much better our world would be if we all focused on making our OWN family the best it can be rather than worrying about what we think others are doing wrong in their families.

You, therefore, have no excuse, you who pass judgment on someone else, for at whatever point you judge another, you are condemning yourself, because you who pass judgment do the same things. Now we know that God’s judgment against those who do such things is based on truth. So when you, a mere human being, pass judgment on them and yet do the same things, do you think you will escape God’s judgment?”  Romans 2:1-3

“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” –Ephesians 4:29

“There is only one lawgiver and judge, he who is able to save and to destroy. But who are you to judge your neighbor?” –James 4:12


Claire and Dan said...

From what I've heard the criticism is mostly related to the fact that she had a condition with her last pregnancy that can be fatal for her so that's why the baby was delivered so early. It may or may not come back this time so that's a risk they're willing to take it looks like. I don't watch the show either, but with reality TV it's definitely too easy for everyone-even Christians- to "know" best and give their opinion. Hoping this pregnancy is healthy!

Anonymous said...

Great Post. While I myself would go crazy with 20 kids I think it is really "to each their own." I haven't watched the show in years but I commend them for the way they are raising their kids and I think it is truly amazing that they are debt free :)
I hope this pregnancy is a healthy one!

Faith said...

what i have heard that she wasn't in the best healthy state and things could possibly go wrong.

i understand they don't want to have any birth control because it goes against their beliefs but i wonder why it has to go this far especially since she is such a Fertile Myrtle. there are only a few times in the month that you could actually get pregnant so i just wished they would think of that. i mean, i wonder sometimes, if this is her decisions. or her husbands? can she actually say enough is enough? but i truly don't know if this is really what she wants or not.

but yes, you are right. it is their life. it doesn't affect me. i just would truly hate for 20kids to be without a mother because of something like this. at the end of the day, when you go on reality tv you are subjecting yourself to the critisms and other opinions you don't care for. it is up to you as an individual to take what you want to hear and throw the rest out. it's life, no one is going to be 100% happy with your decisions regardless if it affects them or not.

but i truly hope that everything goes well with this pregnancy!

*Butler, Party of 4* said...

I heard the same story. If I was in the same position as her, I can't say I would want to have another child knowing that possibility, but ultimately it is their decision. Regardless, it's not my place to judge them for their choice. I don't want people to judge me for my choices- especially considering I try to pray about my decisions and seek God's will for my life.

I know when people choose to put their life on reality television they can expect to be subject to lots of criticism. I will say that I do think they are the "real deal" and are a great example to others through their show.

As you all said, I hope it's a healthy pregnancy! And still, I wish Christians could be more mindful of the Scriptures concerning being judgmental. I honestly believe it's one of the biggest "turnoffs" to non-believers.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts! I'm always interested to hear what others think about a topic...helps me be a more "well-rounded" person.

roddma said...

First of all they are part of the Quiverfull movement that shuns birth control even if the mother is high risk. they also embrace the teachings of Bill Gothard. Second, it is obvious the older girls are saddled with the most of the child rearing. Third, they put themselves in the spotlight. Fourth they have a preemie baby not quite two who still needs special care. And all they think about is another? I am for choice but only logical ones. Enough with the debt-free and welfare. Plenty of parents not on welfare abuse their kids and it easy to be debt-free when you are supported by religious organizations and a TV show.

Mrs. Pancakes said...

I guess it's none of our business but unfortunately when you live your life in opens the door for public opinion and scrutiny. Plus they are making money off of all the children they have. My whole thing is how much attention do you have to give to all these kids. The bigger kids are basically taking care of the younger ones and this cannot be fair!

Diana Amy said...

Preach it sister! Although I do agree with Mrs. Pancakes that a price comes with "fame," and that is the judgement of strangers - however, as Christians, we should rise above that temptation! I love that verse from Ephesians, it reminds me to use my words to give grace, not make myself look better by bringing others down!

Dr Goodwin :) said...

I thank the Lord above that it ISN'T my job to judge others. The Lord is so wise to know that our feeble sinful human minds can't make those decisions, and I praise Him for it. I know that I would make mistakes. Family size is to be determined by the family... and no one else. I couldn't agree more that it is no one's business but their own - regardless of their reasons. Life is a risk. It's a risk to get in your car in the morning and drive down the road. And people can have high risk pregnancies no matter how many children they have. I am blessed with my two who were both high risk and have health issues. God has blessed me beyond measure.

"Jesus said, "'Love the Lord your God with all your passion and prayer and intelligence.' This is the most important, the first on any list. But there is a second to set alongside it: 'Love others as well as you love yourself.' These two commands are pegs; everything in God's Law and the Prophets hangs from them." - Matthew 22:37 - 40