Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Lies Women Believe About Priorities

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If I asked you to write out your priorities in order, what would you put on that list?? 

I know I could write out a list that looks pretty similar to this one…My relationship with the Lord, Jonathan, Family & Friends, Church, Job…but if I’m REAL, that wouldn’t be very honest. That might be my intentions, but I don’t think my actions always reflect that. For example…I never go ANYWHERE without my cell  phone. Ever. But I only bring my Bible with me when I go to church on Sundays and Wednesdays. If my priorities were truly in the order I listed, don’t you think those two things would be flip flopped?

Wanna know your priorities? Ask your family to list out what they think they are. And ask them to be HONEST. Not the pretty, packaged little list that they know are your intentions…

Women these days are expected to juggle many demands and responsibilities that come with each season of life.  Unfortunately, many women feel inadequate, insecure, overwhelmed, and just plain TIRED.  We often feel incapable of managing the many hats we wear and balancing the various responsibilities we carry. But here’s the deal. God never intended for us to feel this way!!

I feel like this is especially true in a Pinterest generation! Don’t get me wrong….I LOOOOVE me some Pinterest & it is one of my FAVORITE things on the internet! (Seriously, so many awesome tips, ideas, recipes, and a quick fix for everything- it’s genius!) But I’m afraid many of us spend hours each week looking at all of these things we never actually attempt or plan to make a reality.  We take time away from our family pinning things we wish were a reality for us.

Seriously, you can look at my boards and see what my life might “look like” if I had my dream house that is crazy organized; an incredible wardrobe leading in all the latest fashion trends (oh, and in one of those AWESOME closets that are the size of my bedroom, please); homecooked, healthy, perfectly balanced, all organic meals for every meal that are cut into shapes & even match every holiday; daily craft & homeschool sessions; a SMOKIN’ bod with 6 pack abs, a tight booty, and toned arms; glowing skin & hair with flawless makeup application and perfectly curled hair; making all of my own cleaning products, laundry detergent, etc.; have a thriving career & perfectly balanced budget; hand sew all of our kids own clothes with everything monogrammed; all while living out all of the Scriptures & motivational quotes.

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And y’all know as well as I do this list could go ON, and ON, and ON.

Does anyone else feel this way??? I don’t know about y’all, but most days I feel like I’m doing pretty good to just get my hair in a pony tail (not saying it’s brushed- but hey, who’s askin’?) & clothes that halfway match (except socks- they don’t count).  I’m not saying Pinterest is a bad thing in ANY way, but I do see a trend- I feel like women are living lives with our priorities out of whack….and that is leaving us feeling like failures. Constantly overwhelmed, inadequate, and exhausted.

Y’all, God called us to live lives of PEACE!! Joy. Contentment. We have got to learn to recognize the Enemy’s lies and learn to combat them with the TRUTH of God’s Word. Man, there is SUCH freedom in that!

I know I’ve said it a million times, but this is HANDS DOWN one of the BEST books I’ve ever read, and it has truly transformed my walk with the Lord and my way of thinking. If you are looking for something, I definitely recommend it. I have bought it for many of my friends, and the ones who have read it have RAVED about it.

Here are a look at some of the lies women believe about priorities:

“**THE LIE: 1) I don’t have time to do everything I’m supposed to do.

I know this one is SO true for me!!! I tend to WAY overload my plate, so my life always feels chaotic & hectic.

Nearly 70% of women surveyed said they believe this and it’s the number one lie they identify with. Women feel overwhelmed by how much they have to do and how little time they have to do it. As a result, many women are living breathless, frazzled, discouraged lives. Really, we have no more or less time than any other humans…we have 24 hours in a day, 168 hours in a week, and 52 weeks in a year. Our frustration comes when attempt to take on responsibilities that are not on His agenda. We establish our own priorities (or let others determine) the priorities of our life, rather than taking time to discern what God wants us to do. Then we end up buried under piles of half finished, poorly done, or never attempted projects and tasks. We end up living with guilt, frustration, and haste, rather than enjoying the peaceful, well-ordered life he intends.

THE TRUTH:

· There is time in every day to do the things God wants me to do. (Psalm 90:10-12; Luke 10:38-42; John 17:4; Acts 20:24; Ephesians 2:10) **ALL we have to do are the things God assigns us. (Notice that does not say the things “I want to do,” or “so & so wants me to do.”) It is powerful to ask the Lord every morning to order your steps so you can accomplish what HE wants from you.

“I have glorified thee on earth; I have finished the work thou gavest me to do.” - John 17:4

**THE LIE: 2) I can make it without consistent time in the Word and prayer.

Anyone else struggle with this one?? I know I do! Even though it sounds crazy and may not be anything we would ever say out loud (because we know it sounds ridiculous), we live our lives as if we believe this. I can SO tell the days I don’t take time to do my quiet time or devotions…it’s amazing what those 10-15 minutes can do for my entire attitude and the whole course of my day!

The essence of Satan’s deception is that we can live our lives independently of God. If he can get us to live without a personal relationship, he knows we will feel empty. Satan knows if he can get us to operate on our own thoughts and ideas (without seeking the Lord and wisdom that comes only from God), he knows we will eventually get sucked into the world’s destructive way of thinking. We know the value of spending time along with God in His Word and in prayer, but too often we are “too busy” or too focused on the tasks of our day without spending adequate time with God FIRST. When we skip time with Him, we are basically saying we can do our own work, keep our home, handle our relationships, and deal with our circumstances on our own- WITHOUT His help. This is PRIDE, and we know what the Bible says about pride. (James 4:6; Proverbs 16:18)

THE TRUTH:

· It is impossible for me to be the woman God wants me to be apart from spending consistent time cultivating a relationship with Him in the Word and prayer. (Job 23:12; Psalm 5:3; 119:147; Proverbs 2:1-6; 3:5-6; Matthew 6:25-34; 14:23; James 4:6)

· Apart from living in conscious union and dependence on Him, I cannot do anything of spiritual or eternal value. I can create a lot of activity and make a lot of decisions, but not that mater an eternal impact.

**THE LIE: 3) A career outside the home is more valuable and fulfilling than being a wife and mother.

I am going to write another whole post dedicated to this one…

Half a century ago, women decided we needed to be liberated- we needed freedom. They replaced words such as virtue, chastity, discretion, domesticity, submission, and modesty with words such as choice, divorce, infidelity, power, and equality. This demeaned marriage and motherhood and encouraged women to get out into workforce. In determining our priorities as Christian women, we must first ask why God created women and His mission for us. It is not WRONG to have a job outside of the home unless that job diminishes effectiveness in fulfilling a woman’s primary calling at home. It is important to evaluate reasons for working outside the home and determine if there is any deception there. (ex: “We can’t survive off of only one income.”)

Ø Genesis 2:18

Ø 1 Timothy 5:9-10

Ø 1 Corinthians 7:32-35

THE TRUTH:

· In the will of God, there is now higher, holier calling than to be a wife and mother. (1 Timothy 5:9-10)

· God uniquely designed the woman to be a nurturer of life. (Genesis 2:24; 3:20)

· There is no greater measure of a woman’s worth or success than the extent to which she serves as the heart of her home. (1 Corinthians 7:32-35; Titus 2:4-5)

· God’s plan is that a woman’s primary attention and efforts should be devoted to ministering to the needs of her husband and children. (Genesis 2:18)”

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Time to get our priorities in order, ladies!! And stop believing the enemies lies.

DeMoss, Nancy Leigh. Moody Publishers; Repreinted edition edition (April 2002).

6 comments:

Shannon said...

Love this post. I'm currently struggling with whether my full time job is where I should be. I don't have kids, but my job has drained every ounce of energy I have, and I'm beginning to bring frustrations from work home and take them out on my poor (yet incredibly understanding and loving) husband.

I FEEL IT in my heart that God is giving me an answer, and I am trying so so hard to figure out where He's directing me. I appreciate you sharing those scriptures on the lie about working outside the home. I'm going to read and pray over them some more! :)

Shannon

Anonymous said...

absolutely beautiful post - so much of our insecuities, lack of self esteem, feeling as though we "failed" come from believing these lies...

I cannot wait to pick up a copy of this book...

Thanks again for all of your wonderful blogs!

The Granberrys said...

I definitely want to read this book now!!! Thanks for sharing!

Anonymous said...

I have to respectfully disagree, I see that so much of our self worth is tied to being a wife and a mother. It is an assumption and an expectation that we will all be mothers. So what happens when you end up in my shoes and you find out you are unable to have children? Are women such as myself not "chosen" to be blessed?

Anonymous said...

I am currently reading this book and loving it!

Anonymous said...

I love your blog! I feel like if we met we would be best friends. So many things you write about speak to my heart. I just wanted to say thank you so much for writing about this. I am a woman who was conflicted for years by lies. The world was telling me one thing and God and my heart was telling me another. I was a working single gal for sooo long but had a secret shame to admit that I longed to be a wife and mother and that was the deepest desire of my heart. After I got married, my husband and I were both working demanding jobs and we quickly realized it was not the life we wanted - we barely saw each other and were constantly stressed and running in totally opposite directions. We took it to the Lord in prayer and stepped out on faith and I quit my job. Even though it was a big financial change for us we have been so happy, and I can't believe the joy and peace I have found being a stay at home wife. I would just want to say to anyone reading this, if you feel God calling you to stay home please don't let the world and people stop you. So many people looked at me like a space alien or dinosaur, and I still get tons of comments about our lifestyle, but I am learning to not care. All that matters is that we are following God's leading and are so at peace. Don't look to the culture for affirmation and identity - look to the Lord.