Tuesday, December 10, 2019


I think we’ve all finally come to the conclusion & realization that you can’t compare your real life with anyone else’s social media life, right? I mean, we can keep talking about it because I know we sometimes need the reminder to stay in own own lane, but I think we’ve brought enough attention to the “highlight reel” that it’s pretty much understood now. So this isn’t a post about the comparison trap.
It’s about grace.
Jonathan & I have had some tough life stuff happen.
Jon’s very best friend was killed in a car accident right before our wedding. My big brother passed away unexpectedly just a few years later. The next year we lost Jon’s mom, 2 weeks before I was due with our second son. Three unexpected calls you never want to get. Three people we fully expected to be here today.
Then it was a close family member getting a cancer diagnosis. And this time last year I had a miscarriage. In May, we lost a six figure income when our business restructured, right before we were about to have our 4th baby.
It’s life. Life is hard sometimes, isn’t it? Unpredictable.
But we are seriously SO.VERY.BLESSED. The blessings we’ve experienced over that same span of time are too numerous to count. So we choose to focus on that, even in the hard.
And ya know what I’ve learned? ALL of my friends & family...the people I know best and am closest to...they could all rattle off their “lists” too. They all have their hard stuff they’ve dealt with. They may or may not put it out there, but they’re having to navigate losses, struggles, and trials in the midst of their beautiful lives. And my guess is you have too.
So I understand now, even more as I’ve grown older, that we just really need to just give everyone a lot more GRACE. Because everyone you meet is probably carrying around some heavy stuff, just like you are and just like I am. And chances are, even if they are open & transparent about it, & even if everything looks beautiful & happy in all their posts (because there probably really is a lot of beautiful & happy too, even in the hard), we still have no idea their whole story.
So can we just be happy for people when they’re experiencing victories? Cheer them on? And pray for them when they need prayers & are hurting? And not place expectations on others? And be quicker to forgive & assume the best in someone’s intentions? Goodness, our world could sure use a lot more of that!! Less worrying about things we can’t control, and way more intentionally choosing grace. Staying in our own lane, but with a whole lot more thinking about others and a whole lot less thinking about ourselves.
And just in case you’re reading this and don’t have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, do you know who was/is my rock during all of that? My husband is beyond incredible, smart, talented, & hard working, but it wasn’t him. My children bring me so much joy & are my world, but it wasn’t them. My parents and family are so helpful & generous, but it wasn’t them. My friends are some of the best & so encouraging and supportive, but it wasn’t them either. That’s too much weight to put on any person, or even your village. But it’s never too much for God.
“On Christ the solid ROCK I stand, all other ground is sinking sand.” 
He knows. He cares. He’ll never leave you nor forsake you. He’ll give you a peace that passes all understanding. He’s a good, good Father. And I’m so grateful for his good GRACE.
Let’s pass that same grace on to others today...

1 comment:

Peggy said...

Remembering and focusing on our blessings is so important - even more so in the hard times. One thing I did when my kids were young, and to help them, and me, remember to focus on the blessings was I created a "Blessing Board". Each month I put a nice scrapbook piece of paper on the refrigerator and any/all things that were a blessing for the month were written on it. We used colored pens, drew pictures and it became a fun reminder for us all to "put it on the Blessing Board." I now have those sheets saved in an album.