Saturday, June 8, 2019


If you complain about something without offering a solution, then YOU are part of the problem.

Earlier this week, Jonathan took his pre-workout, we got all the boys ready & loaded in the car to head to the gym, then drove the 20+ minutes (past other gyms) to get there, unloaded all the boys and walked in. (We chose this gym specifically because it has childcare, & it saves us time to be able to work out together.) When we arrived, they had to turn us away because there weren’t enough staff members per child in the daycare. Basically the gym daycare was too full, so we couldn’t work out. This was the fifth or sixth time this has happened since school let out a few weeks ago, and I was pretty irritated by it. I wasn’t rude, but I also wasn’t kind and understanding by any means. (And I know it’s not the workers’ fault. They are just following protocol, which I do appreciate.) Here’s the deal. We’ve had an “eventful” couple of weeks to say the least, we haven’t been able to work out much, and I just REALLY needed the endorphins. (Clearly.)

I am not the type to complain (like, I never send my food back, always try to be the bigger person and offer grace), but I asked for the manager’s contact info and planned to call/email her because this cannot continue happening. I am pretty sure Jon and I both huffed and puffed our way to the car like children, loaded the boys back up, and headed home. I am sure it sounds silly (because it feels a little silly even typing it out, but I wanted to give context to where the post came from…it was ME!), but for us, this is our main hobby + stress relief. And honestly we probably wouldn’t have cared if it hadn’t happened so many times in such a short time frame. (We’ve never had the issue until recently because normally we go during the day while all other kids are in school.)

Right as I was about to type up an e-mail (since the manager is out of town), that quote popped in my head. DON’T you dare complain without offering a solution to the problem! And be GRATEFUL! Well, okay then…

So, Jon & I brainstormed a few ideas of how they could eliminate this from being an issue in the future & I have a draft typed up in my e-mail. And honestly. I’ll probably just wait till she gets back in town because this type of thing typically seems much nicer in person anyway. (For me, at least.)

But the whole deal got me thinking.

I had actually JUST shared an article in my healthy moms group about how chronic complaining impacts our bodies on the cellular level and leads to higher rates of anxiety, depression, and disease in an individual. It doesn’t surprise me this would be one of consequences when God’s Word clearly instructs us NOT to complain.

Do everything without grumbling or arguing. - Philippians 2:14

And do not grumble, as some of them did-and were killed by the destroying angel. - 1 Corinthians 10:10

Don’t grumble against one another, brothers and sisters, or you will be judged. The Judge is standing at the door! - James 5:9

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. - Ephesians 4:29

**Want to know the remedy if you have a tendency to complain?? GRATITUDE! And CHOOSING to focus on the good.

Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. - 1 Thessalonians 5:18

Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- think about such things. - Philippians 4:8

Silly, insignificant situation with a BIG reminder!! I’m so grateful for how the Holy Spirit convicts us and prompts us even in the daily things of life.

I don’t ever want to be known as a complainer. I don’t want my children to see/hear me complain because I don’t want to set a sinful example for them to follow. I don’t want others to not want to be around me (because seriously, complainers are NOT enjoyable to be around). I want to be JOYFUL, GRATEFUL, and GRACIOUS. I’m praying the Lord removes the sentence “I’m not trying to complain, but…” from my vocabulary, because clearly whatever is coming next is a complaint. We tend to undermine complaining, but the bottom line is when God’s Word says DON’T, I want to take that seriously. Anyone else need that reminder as much as I obviously did??


Lauren said...

Thanks so much for this post, especially the list of scripture to mark as reminders. You probably already thought of this as a solution, but the way our JCC does childcare is that you can schedule ahead of time or drop off without scheduling but with the understanding that scheduled folks get first dibs. And if you schedule and don’t show, you’re charged a fee. It works beautifully—and it gives me a little added accountability because I don’t want to schedule, decide to skip, and be charged a fee! I hope it works out for y’all (no pun intended—ha!). Grace is never a bad idea, right?

Mamashorts said...

I needed this! Thank you! I can get caught up in complaining and then I hear my kids complain:( I want to set the example and not complain! How great that our god takes all our “stuff”����

Mamashorts said...

Grace is never a bad idea! I think we all need it in most areas of our own lives!!