Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Actions Speak Louder Than Words!!!!

I know this sounds strange, but I’m not really one for apologies. It doesn’t mean much if someone says “sorry”… but I know they mean it if they sincerely try to not to do the same thing again. Not that I don’t appreciate an apology, it’s just that it doesn’t mean much if someone continues to do the same thing over and over.

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I’m not sure if this has to do with my love language or what, but I think we can all agree talk is cheap. Don’t TELL me something…..SHOW me. I try to make sure I do this. There are a LOT of people who say one thing, but proclaim something completely different with their actions, lifestyle, etc.Pinned Image

I think this is why so many people think Christians and the church is full of hypocrites. Don’t get me wrong. I am FAR FROM PERFECT. I screw up every single day, almost as soon as I wake up in the morning. But you better believe I try my best to make sure my attitude and actions reflect what I say.

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If you’re going to talk the talk, WALK THE WALK.

This rings true in so many areas. You can’t be a personal trainer telling people to eat grilled fish and veggies, then go eat cheeseburgers and drink beer. I’m probably not going to trust a hair dresser whose own hair is a hot mess. Probably not very effective for a parent to tell their kid not to do something, then they do it. You can’t be a Christian and then judge everybody, gossip, etc. and expect people to want what you have. You can’t be a financial advisor if your own finances are a wreck. (I know there are exceptions to each of these, but you get my drift. These are just a few examples of why our ACTIONS have to back up our words and beliefs!)

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It drives me ABSOLUTELY bonkers when people are negative, constantly complaining, and ungrateful. I have written multiple posts about CHOOSING to focus on the positive in our circumstances and all of our blessings. That is a CHOICE. The reason some people’s lives suck so bad is because they focus on all the negative. I mean REALLY….do we all have a roof over our head? a computer or phone to be reading this on? are we naked? when is the last time you had to skip a meal?? Let’s get serious. We all have LOTS of blessings in our life we can focus on.

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Gotta be honest….The last few months have been pretty trying for us. Our house flooded and we were out of our home for over 2 months. We had to deal with the insurance company, which you know is a nightmare. Jon’s transmission went out. We’ve had some family drama. It was the end of a school year, which is always crazy hectic. I’m dealing with some emotions from meeting my biological family this summer. We’ve been in the process of refinancing for a lower interest rate, which means a TON of paperwork. Plus, Jonathan is building a new business and has been working ridiculous hours, so we haven’t been able to spend as much time together as we normally do. We are normally inseparable and do EVERYTHING together….and we both like it that way- we’re best friends.

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Yes, a lot of those circumstances are not ideal.  So, I had/have a choice. I can dwell on them, whine and complain, feel sorry for myself, etc. OR….I can choose to be JOYFUL through the trials. I think it smarts with every small thing, and if you’re not choosing to focus on the positive in small things, you’re not going to be able to during bigger trials either.

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I chose to focus on the positive. At least we have a house- our very own home that we love. It didn’t burn down. And the Lord provided the perfect place for us to stay during those 2 1/2 months. AND now we have new floors, countertops, and paint. At least we both have vehicles, and he was able to catch the transmission issue before it caused him to wreck. And that we have family who allowed us to borrow a vehicle for the 2 weeks it took to get his truck fixed. At least school is out for summer and I have a few months to rejuvenate. At least I have an opportunity to meet my biological family, establish some new relationships, and learn more about my family history. At least we have the option to refinance and rates are killer! At least Jonathan is the MOST HARDWORKING man I have ever met and has an incredible desire to provide for our family. (Seriously, I KNOW what a blessing that is…I have never. ever met another man as driven in this area as my husband is and I am truly thankful for that.)

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See how that works? It’s so simple….I chose my perspective on those situations, and I can tell you that I was much better off (along with everyone around me) by remaining optimistic, positive, and continuing to focus on my blessings. Like I said, I am not perfect by any means. I have LOTS of flaws and things God is constantly dealing with me about and revealing to me. But I refuse to let Satan steal my thoughts and joy and take glory away from all that God has blessed me with!! (Have you ever thought of it that way? If you focus on the negative, complain, whine, mope, have pity parties, etc., YOU are CHOOSING and ALLOWING Satan to steal your joy! That’s almost like slapping God in the face.)

I truly feel SO BEYOND blessed!!!! I hear so many people say that, write it on FB, whatever, but when it comes down to it, they sure don’t act that way.

If you’re thankful and grateful, show it. WALK the WALK.

I honestly don’t have much sympathy for people who are “woe is me” when their life is full of blessings. It’s exhausting and mentally draining to be around people like that, and I don’t really enjoy being around those type of people. I try to encourage them as much as I can, but honestly, I try not to be around them if I can help it because I believe in surrounding yourself with people who are going to lift you up and encourage you.Pinned Image

I also believe God POURS out blessings on a joyful heart. He LOVES a joyful giver/believer. Whether you’re giving finances, time, a lending ear, whatever, if you’re doing it for Him, he will bless the snot out of you. I want that. His desire is to give us “exceedingly, abundantly more than we can ask or imagine.” The thing is, He has already given most of us that, and we are missing it.

Have you thought about lately…..”WHAT ARE MY ACTIONS/ATTITUDE SPEAKING TO OTHERS???”

Some of us need to really get it in check, because it’s not lining up with our words.


Danielle said...

I can not agree more! Since I have been reading your posts I have noticed that you do this and it makes me try harder to talk about positive things. Sure things sometimes stink and don't work out perfectly and you need to vent - but you don't need to vent to everyone all the time. Do it, release the tension, then move to the positive angel on all of it :)

Nikki said...

Danielle you have got to be the most positive person I know and I thank you so so much for posts like this! It really is a eye opener about how negative people can be. I try to remain as positive as I can be in times of sorrow and I will be honest it is FAR from easy but you are so so right it is so much better for us as humans to say positive and have a good outlook on life. I have been through the ringer myself and one thing I have always tried to do is remind myself that what ever hasnt killed me has made me stronger and more positive!

Kate said...

Love this post! I try to be positive sometimes I have my days (I think we all do)! Whoa!! Netting your biological parents?!? How was that? That can really cause some different emotions... I wish you the best

Ashley said...

Love this post!!!

I am your newest follower!!!

Feel free to pop by and say hello sometime ;)

Emily said...

LOVE THIS!!! I think this is an area that we ALL struggle with but I do know SO many people who live in the world of negative and "i'm a victim" type personalities. It's EXHAUSTING always having to lift people up. It get tiring to be around people who constantly try to "one up you" in their negativity (if I say "I have a cold" they say "omg I totally have a fever and the flu and am vomiting nonstop..." you get my point!). You're very blessed that you CAN separate yourself from those type of situations!!! Those people only bring us down with them, it's WAY tougher to pull them UP and much easier for them to pull us DOWN ya know??? I, too, try to see the good in all things. Sometimes it's hard. And my natural "Mrs Negativity" side will come out but I will say with confidence that I am a TOTALLY different person since becoming a Christian. I feel that most of the people I know who have attitudes like that MUST not know the Lord or must not be striving to live as close to Him as they need to be. If you're walking towards the light it's impossible to live in the darkness ;) I was ALWAYS a glass half empty person and the LORD has given me the ability to see it as half full :) Love you and thank you for having the guts to put out there what I'm too nervous to say myself! You inspire me!

Jenn @ Bliss to Bean said...

Your attitude is awesome!! I loathe the Debbie downers and no, life is not always perfect..but it can always be way worse!! So happy you can find the good in all things. I can only imagine how trying it has been for you two. I hope you can sneak in some romantic time and relax.....xo